Too soon……

Don’t you just love the age of texting??  OMG, I do – I love it.  I despise talking on the phone – or maybe I fear talking on the phone, I don’t know – but I avoid it at all costs.  Texting is just God’s gift to me….yes, to me.  Thanks, God.  I mean, out of all my prayers, you picked the ‘give me an alternative to talking on the phone’ one, to grant me.  Well, okay, your decision, you are God, so – I’ll take it.

Back to texting and all of its awesomeness.   A lot of online dating, I’m realizing, is just texting…..for hours and hours and days on end.   It’s quite time consuming – you really have to commit to this whole process.  I’m thinking I need to take a leave of absence from work to focus on texting Mr. Right….or Mr. Not-Horribly-Wrong….whatever.   (Is that covered under FMLA?   I should look into that…)

You can message one another directly on the site.  There’s a bit of a delay so the messages get out of order and can be difficult to know to which question they just answered the word “yes”.  “So, have you been on the site long”……”you’re not a convicted felon, are you?”

“yes”

Wait…..what?

So, after you realize this person is worth chatting with, you exchange phone numbers in order to prevent dangerous miscommunication.  Now, at first, this really came as a shock to me – give my number to a total stranger???   But, I guess the whole point is to try to get to get to know these total strangers, and if we’d met in real-life, in the outside world, we would’ve exchanged numbers, I assume, right?  So, what’s the difference really?   I can always block the crazies later, if need be.

So, we chat online, as I said, for a while, then when we both think we seem to be clicking and would like to keep in touch, we exchange numbers.  Now – here is where you can really weed ’em out.   If the very first text you receive from this person is a pic…and I mean a pic,  (are ya hearing me???), well then, I gotta do the combo block/*swipe!* move.   I mean, we’re all pretty hard up – hence the dating site, and I’m no prude, but…lets save a little mystery until we at least know each other’s last names….

And oh my goodness…..we really have to be a little farther along in our non-relationship before you send me a video….a video…..ya with me?   jeez….

What makes a person take that leap?  How does one go from “let’s exchange numbers” to “I’ll show you mine….”

Me:  “So, how many kids do you have?”

Him:  “3, all grown and out of the house, though”,

Me:  “oh, that’s nice”

**genital shot here**

ACK!!!  MY EYES!!!   WTF!?!   I totally was not ready for that!!!    Maybe a little warning would help…or, I don’t know….throw it in during a conversation that would warrant a pic such as that.  Like, say, should I specifically ask, “So, what does your….unit….look like?”   Now, I’ve yet to actually ask that, but I feel like in that instance, it’d be okay for someone to just bypass the description of said unit, and just send a pic.   Just sayin…I can see maybe one occasion when it would be very appropriate to send a pic.   However, I’ve yet to experience that one occasion and I have received numerous – I’m talkin’ numerous – pics.    Guys!  Come on – let’s keep a little mystery, shall we???

Rule #4:    Don’t date a guy who shows his ‘little mystery’ too soon….

2 thoughts on “Too soon……”

  1. Was it really a “little mystery”? I agree if you are average 4-6 or below average save it…at least till you perhaps pass the “oral test”. Chances are if u pass that we can look past the “small mystery” at least I have!

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